I was going over the site of the place where I work now - Palestinian Media Watch. They have a section of videos. I had to go over all of them to make sure they’re working properly. They’re all from Palestinian TV because that’s basically what the organization I work for studies – Palestinian media, TV, newspapers, etc.

They don’t analyze it, they don’t distort it, they just present it as it is because it clearly speaks for itself and the message is blunt and strong – Palestinian authority is brainwashing their people, and the people are buying into their shit and cause their own demise. They can obviously say the same thing about Israelis, but I doubt they’ll have anything to back it up. If Israelis teach violence to their 6-year-old children, they sure don’t broadcast it on TV.

In any case, the videos by politicians who scream “Death to Israel” to their people, and religious leaders who scream “Death to the Jews” to their worshippers don’t shock me as much anymore. We know they’re all out to get us because we:

-         Killed Muhammad

-         Are pagans

-         Killed Jesus (why they care about Jesus, I’ll never understand)

-         Faked the Holocaust

-         Stole their land and drove them out

-         Eat their children

-         Hide our horns and our tails

If you pay attention to what the bully says (yes, an Israeli just called the PALESTINIANS “the bully”) he’ll just keep it up. So I became completely desensitized to their preposterous Dark Ages claims.

What does shock me, however, is how they brainwash their children into believing these lies. Not only that, mothers willingly and enthusiastically send their children out to get killed and glorify martyrdom. There are videos of children 11, 12, 13 years old who say they wish to become shahids (die for Allah) to kill the “descendents of monkeys and pigs” (Israelis).

Mothers! It’s against the very nature of any female living creature to put her children in any kind of danger. A mother cat hissed at me when I just passed by the litter of kittens she just gave birth to. How can these Palestinian mothers actually send their young ones to war zones to throw stones at tanks and soldiers HOPING and PRAYING TO GOD their children will die and become martyrs. Why do you think so many Palestinian children are being killed, caught in crossfires and all that shit? Any idiot knows to keep his kids away from such dangerous areas, but Palestinians don’t keep them away. They send them there willingly because not only do they supposedly become shahids, but also they can have a funeral for the media and get the sympathy of the world.

And the world obviously buys into that shit. Because the world doesn’t bother to stop and ask “how can such a thing happen?” The world prefers to keep it simple, click its tongue and shake its head. Label us as the bad guys and label them the victims. They don’t understand that the true criminals here are the Pals who sacrifice their kids for Allah. The mothers kiss them, give them a rifle or a few stones and send them out to the field or to blow themselves up in the midst of an Israeli crowd killing children as young as them.

On top of that, they actually believe this whole story of the 72 virgins. When I first heard of that, I thought it was a myth, a rumor people made up to make fun of suicide terrorists. But it isn’t. They call them the 72 virgins “Dark-Eyed Maidens.” If a women becomes a shahida, she becomes one of the Maidens (regardless of whether she was a virgin on earth or not). If a man becomes a shahid, he gets to marry and shnab all his Maidens. Basically, their idea of heaven is promiscuous sex.

Fun fact: Assuming the maidens story is true, statistics show that there are a lot more Shahids than Shahidas. So basically, the martyrs will have to settle for some good old homosexual sex.

How can people be so pathetically naïve? How can they be willing to kill their children for a fairy tale heaven that has no proof of existence? It boggles the mind. Religion drives people fucking mad. I’m really starting to believe all the nihilists and atheists who say that religion is the cause of all wars.

Fairy tales! “Snow White was a Christian!” “No! She was a Muslim.” Fuck that! She’s a fictional character! Stop shitting your pants over it!

*Breath* One of the videos was broadcasted for the event of International Women’s Day and glorified mothers who encourage their sons to become martyrs. I’m sorry, dude, but that just goes way overboard. These mothers are a vile, disgusting example for any self-respecting woman. No amount of belief in a god, no amount of desperation and no amount of hate could make any woman with any degree of humanity willingly send her kids out to get killed. If men around the world see these videos, they would say: “We were right when we initiated the witch hunts! Women are evil!” They make me ashamed to be a woman, and I rarely does anyone have the power to do that.

Hamas actually listed one of the mothers of a shahid as one of its candidates for election. It should give you an idea of the kind of Palestinian “politicians” Israel has to put up with. And here is the video of it followed by an interview with the woman and excerpts from the video of her parting from her son before he went out to carry out a suicide attack that killed 5 teens (in Arabic with English subtitles): http://www.pmw.org.il/asx/um_nidal.asx

For more such nutcase videos, go here: http://www.pmw.org.il/tv.html

Peace, love and “Oh, I’m sorry, we’re fresh out of Maidens. But we just got 72 fat, hairy, burly, sweaty, bearded Shahids with diapers on their heads shipped here yesterday."

I cooked some food and since my TV doesn't work, I was sitting there in my matchbox apartment eating while staring into blank space with my thoughts running wild. I figured something out. I figured out why this world has so many problems and why our life can be so shitty sometimes.

I say, if our lives were perfect, if this world was perfect, what's the point of living? Solving a problem, finding the ultimate solution means it's the end. It's over, there's nothing worth living for. Complaints and pessimism keeps us alive because somehow, whether consciously or not, we strive to improve our lives and this world. We never completely achieve that. Actually, while improving one thing, we ultimately destroy another.

For example, when we clean our house, we use water. Water sources become scarce and our house becomes clean. We also take out the garbage. The environment suffers because of our trash and our shit, and our house becomes clean.

There is always something that needs to be done. Even jobs. I work for Palestinian Media Watch and it's rather interesting to see that even our job may be self-destructive someday. We strive for peace between Israelis and Palestinians by exposing the things that need to be improved in the Palestinian media, society, politics and education. If we achieve our goal, and if there will be peace between Israelis and Palestinians, what's the need for the organization? PMW will simply cease to exist.

So that's why we exist. Problems keep us alive just like the Israeli-Palestinian conflict keeps PMW running. The Israeli-Palestinian conflict currently pays my rent and my bills. It's aweful, but it's reality. If the lives of people in Africa would improve, Sally Struthers and her counterparts would all have to retire. So Sally Struthers bills are being paid at the expense of poor, starving, dying children in Africa. The same goes for cops, politicians, lawyers, doctors, scientists, journalists, death metal bands... If all the problems in this world were solved, they'd all be out on their ass.

The world is not improving. Our lives are not improving. The only change being made is that there are different problems to deal with - problems that were caused by a solution to a previous problem, or problems that will yield solutions which will cause future problems.

This is what I was contemplating the other day while having my chicken-mushroom soup. I had a revelation and now I know the point of life - stirring the shit to keep the world turning. Pure genius! 

Palestinian Media Watch is the place where I'm working now, in Jerusalem. One day, it's gonna fuck me up because every day, Palestinian media manages to shock me more and more.

I mean, I know they hate us and all, but to an extent. Their extent is basically genocide. If they deny the Holocaust ever took place, they made it their goal to make sure it does.

Anyway, I don't feel like going into detail because there are so many things I could say, this blog is gonna run forever. For more information about Palestinian anti-Semitism go here: www.pmw.org.il

And for those of you who don't think that Palestinian can be anti Semites because they're Semites themselves, get an education. When anybody talks about anti-Semitism, they automatically mean the Jews. It's understated. Nobody uses that word when talking about prejudice against Muslims or other Arabs, that's bullshit.

The one thing I will say is that at some point while reading all these quotes from Palestinian religious leaders and  university professors, I litterally started laughing. I just figured they're so deep in their obsession about ridding the land (and the world) of the Jews that they just had some of their lamps explode so the light is not on on all floors. Basically their out of their fucking mind. And this kind of retardation, you're allowed to make fun of. So there.

For the handful of pro-Israeli Arabs who stay as silent as a corpse because they're scared of speaking up (and rightly so), forgive me if I've offended you. You're the silent hope. The dim light in the darkness of oppression, injustice and hatred that is so rampant in many Arab societies. If only there were more of you, we might be able to achieve some form of peace, and maybe our kids wouldn't have to die.

For other Arabs who wish death upon Israel and death upon their sons... Oops, I mean, Shahada (martyrdom), if I've offended you, good, because you should be ashamed of yourselves, daring to call yourselves peaceful seekers of justice. Change the goddam lamps on floors number 1, 3 and 7 and see the light. Oh, and your maps have a mistake on them, that tiny space between Jordan and the Mediterranean is called Israel.

Peace, love and Palestinian extremists should call up Edison.

My mom came for a visit and brought a lot of my shit with her. When I made a list of things she should bring with her, I didn't realize the amount of space it would take up. Now, my apartment is... well, how do I describe it?

Can you imagine a shitstorm in a matchbox?

That's basically what it looks like at the moment.

Though I'm almost positive I can manage it. It'll take a while but I have my posters and my CDs and my books and my guitar, being the basic essentials, and it'll definitely give my walls a little color, my apartment a little vibe, my brain a better passtime than my TV which doesn't work in any case, and my fingers a little practice other than typing my way to carpole tunnel syndrom.

This past weekend was Sukkot - a holiday to remember the huts we used to live in when we were walking around the desert for 40 years, don't ask. It's pretty ridiculous when you think about it. But I like that holiday because I was born on Sukkot, so I get cake and a birthday song, and a couple more white hairs. This time I also wanted the four "minim" that you make a prayer on and shake or something. They're cool because they each represent something.

Back in the day, in Torah class, we learned that the Lulav (plam tree thingy) represents the spine; the Etrog (a fruit that looks like a lemon) represents the heart; the Arava (a plant that usually grows near lakes or something) represents the lips; and the Hadass (another plant, I was named after, apparently translates into myrtle) represents the eyes. They also have different characteristics. The Lulav has taste (dates) but no smell; the Hadass has a smell (a pretty damn good one, too) but no taste; the Etrog has both; and the Arava has neither. 

So in any case, I wanted to buy those, not necessarily for religious purposes, just because I wanted to. Dude, each one of my family members (especially the women) were virtually appalled by that. They were this close to calling me Reform: "Why? Why do you need it? What are you gonna do with it? Women don't need it." That last one got to me the most.

So what if women don't need it? They don't need anything! I don't want those plants because I need them. Hell, I don't want anything because I need it. I get shit because I want to. Do I need a better reason than that? Christ! Even my mom was shocked: "But women are not obligated to do the prayer?"

Of course they're not obligated. You can't obligate women to do shit. But Christ! You also can't obligate them not to. And I'm a woman who chooses to buy the plants just because. It's not like it's a sin or a crime or something that would be hazardous to my health. So why are people so shocked that I would want to have that? Excommunicate my sorry ass for fuck's sake!  

It seemed as if they were saying to me: "If it's a part of the religion, and you're not obligated to do it, stay away from it. The more you can get away with religiously, the better. Don't take on the Jewish man's burden."  

My mom said: "It's something that men do. You wanna be a man?" How the hell should I respond to that? I obviously took that as an insult, because it's like asking me if I wanna be a pig. So no, thanks, I prefer not having a phallus, and keeping my brain between my ears. But I would like to have a spine, a heart, lips and eyes, all in metaphors, all in life forms that don't make a sound when you kill them, that are all identical and perfect like humans will never be.

What's interesting about the shaking tradition is how it often reminds me of how the Pope does the sign of the cross when he goes out to greet the public. Shake to the left, shake to the right, shake to the top, shake to the bottom. Now it sounds like a dance. Maybe that's why it looks like fun. And maybe that's why my family was gonna devour me alive. Comparing the religion to another one should never even be conceived, let alone communicated.

Peace, love and 10-foot Lulav!